Takedowns and clever quips are easy, but empathy and persuasion are better
Ryan Holiday writes about the difference between being right and stating blunt facts to prove your point, and being kind and persuading others to come and share your point of view.
Pushing your opinions, facts, and studies might be ‘true’, but that doesn’t mean that others will accept it, act on it, or even believe you (on a subconscious level). If you work with others, and you’ve pushed your point of view on them, you’ll probably experience the backfire that comes from that.
If you’re in a leadership position, and you push your ideas on others, what happens? How intrinsically motivated will they be to pursue the goals you’ve set together?
If you’re in sales, and you push your ideas on your prospects, will they leave every experience they’ve ever had behind and pursue your vision on their company and results? Chances are slim.
Don’t try to persuade others. It doesn’t work. The best you can do is guide them into new insights that they ‘come up with’ themselves. We can help with that.
Holiday ends his excellent article, which can be read here, with this thought: “If you can’t be kind, if you won’t empathize, then you’re not on the team. That team is Team Humanity, where we are all in this thing together. Where we are all flawed and imperfect. Where we treat other people’s point of view as charitably as we treat our own.”
Most of the times, working harder works. However, sometimes, it just doesn’t.
If you work hard, we’ve always been told, you can achieve anything. And it’s true: If you do the work, can you reap the results. However, with some issues, working harder will not only not work, it’ll be counterproductive.
YouTube channel The Art of Improvement has provided a video about these kinds of issues, called Paradoxical Problems. Click here to view the video.
Take a look at the problems you are facing. In your professional life, your business, or in your personal life. When will working harder be helpful? And when is it a Paradoxical Problem?
What can you do to increase your IQ and perceived smartness?
How we see ourselves, and how others see us, are not just based on rational facts. And the way we act, the things we do, are based on our subconscious beliefs about ourselves, our environment, and our values. We are irrational beings, and we act accordingly.
However, we can improve ourselves and the way we think about ourselves. One of those ways is to actually make conscious decisions about what we want to improve, and then start working at it. It will build new and successful experiences, which will present a new unconscious narrative in ourselves.
Becoming smarter by exercising the brain is one of the ways to do that. Lifehacker gives 10 things you can do to boost your brain power.
We especially like no. 1 on their list: Just believe you can be smarter. If you believe something deeply enough, it will be accepted by your subconscious brain, which dictates 93% of your actions. It’ll help immensely.
The term “personal development” is very much a part of today’s lexicon, but have you ever thought about what it really means?
Svetlana Whitener describes personal development “as a transformational journey, and improving your emotional intelligence (EI) can be a major part of that journey. This is because EI develops your self-awareness and gives you the tools to understand your own needs and the needs of others. EI also elevates your self-actualization by allowing you to honor those needs as well as understand them.”
Personal development, according to us, is very much linked to improving your emotional intelligence on the one hand. On the other hand, what new beliefs can you adapt and make your own? What skills do you need to learn in order to achieve what you want to achieve? How can you increase your sphere of influence? With yourself, and with others?
Whitener also states a number of steps she deems necessary in your lifelong journey of personal development:
Be an internal light
We know, of course, that personal development (and professional development) is also predicated on the goal you tie it to. WHY do you want to develop yourself? WHY is it important? What Goal are you trying to achieve? Without a Goal, without that point on the horizon, the ease with which you develop yourself will be much less – all because of the way our brains are wired.
Need to take the next steps in developing yourself, personally or professionally? Need to improve yourself? Your team? Your sales? Your leadership? The way customers perceive you? Let’s get in touch.
People tend to have a natural aversion to those who make it all about themselves. But wait, is that person you?
Inc. states: “Almost every workplace has at least one toxic employee. You know the type — always negative, tends to bully others, distracts much of the team … the “bad apple” that ruins the barrel. But what if someone were to tell you that you were that person?”
What are the signs that you are the “toxic person”? And what effects does that have on your workplace satisfaction? The relationships you have with your colleagues? With your customers and clients? Your prospects?
Try and look as objectively as possible. If you tick the boxes, it’s time to look at how you can change your behavior, as well as influence how people perceive you. And what lies underneath, on a subconscious level, that you behave like you do?
Do you: – Make everything about you? – Say and do passive-aggressive things? – Feel and show jealousy of other’s successes?
You might be the toxic person in your environment. How does that affect your success? Lead yourself to a better place.
Companies that make superior customer experience a priority reap the benefits of repeat business, ultimately developing a loyal and concrete customer base.
ManagementEvents states: “Customer experience is perhaps the most important aspect of a successful business. If a business manufactures a product that is of great quality and captures a niche in the market with the most amazing features but fails to provide its customers with an environment where they feel comfortable, that business can never be successful.”
And we agree. In the article, you’ll find a number of techniques and strategies that’ll allow you and your people to take the next step in positively influencing the customer experience.
However, if you look critically at your team – do they have the skills to take that step? And if so, do they believe that it’s worth it? Which member of your team might not care as much as you do? Is that a problem? And if so, how to fix it?
This is why Vision Forward know for a fact that an intervention on a deeper level is needed, for every individual, every team, and every organization. The subconscious level. If you don’t tackle someone’s subconscious belief system first, most of the taught skills and knowledge won’t ever be put into practice.
Continually optimizing your sales machine by using neuropsychology
In his book Predictably Irrational, Psychologist Dan Ariely describes a particularly interesting experiment, in which the factor ‘free’ had a specific result on the ‘sales’ of chocolate.
From the article: Experiment 1:
A table was set up offering two kinds of chocolates – expensive luxury truffles and much lesser priced ordinary chocolates.
The luxury chocolates were priced at 15 cents and the ordinary chocolates were priced at 1 cent. 73% of buyers chose the luxury truffle and 27 percent chose the ordinary chocolate.
Next, they decided to see how the ‘free’ factor would change results. In the next run, both prices were lowered by 1 cent.
So now, the luxury chocolates were priced at 14 cents and the ordinary chocolates were made to be free.
Would there be a difference in results? Should there be? After all, both prices were reduced by 1 cent.
This time, 69% of people chose the free ordinary chocolate (up from 27 % before). Only 31% chose the luxury chocolate (down from 73% last time).
Most people chose to miss out on the chance to get an expensive chocolate truffle at a big discount, when they had the option to get the ordinary chocolate for free.
How can you use this in your business? Let’s get in touch, and we’ll help you get set up in the practical application of neuropsychology in your sales machine. We’ve enabled others to become successful with this – so why not you?